THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
