i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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