Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
