Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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