Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize