Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Randomize
