Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Randomize