no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize