What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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