My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Randomize
