party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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