I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
She said her name was "party"
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
sarcasm needs its own font
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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