Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the condom got lost in my hair
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Randomize
