My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize