STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
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