Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize