I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
