: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
