You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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