we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
