I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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