There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
