Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
