I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize