i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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