somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
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