he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
i out mim tonsoeep
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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