I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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