check it out our google latitudes are spooning
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
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