Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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