weddingsv make me drug and hornr
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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