Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
