I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
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just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
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You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.