I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize