you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
When are your genitals available?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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