um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
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