White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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