if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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