We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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