if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
