Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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