They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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