You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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