we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
i came on her dog
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
