Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
