no, he came in my armpit
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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