ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
