i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize