i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
