Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
We got so high we made milksteak
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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